The Practice of the Presence of God- Section 2

Communing with the Father in anything!

Today, I wanted to get around to reading the 2^nd section of the book: “The PRACTICE of the Presence of God”. There are five sections in the book, and am really excited to come further along in the book. It is a good book and stirring me up to new ways of worshipping God! I love it!!

The book is about a monk (Brother Lawrence), and his journey in faith and how it affected the way he carried out his daily tasks of dish washing and as a sandalmaker once he was unable to stand due to his gout..

The purpose on the second section of this book is to examine the CHARACTER of a Catholic monk in the 1600s, whose attention was constantly focused on the Lord’s presence. Realizing and basking in the presence of God is the spiritual discipline that we each need to have in our lives. So often our lives are busy, and never quiet. We so often do not experience God’s presence in a way that we could. I am excited to dive into some more of this book, because I want to experience God in greater ways, as I am sure you do. We make it so much more difficult than it has to be as I am discovering for myself. It is no so much about the reading, but the aftermath of experiencing God in a mighty way in light of what I have read. I am excited to see what God is going to teach me in this next year. This will be a journey that will not always feel fun, but it will teach me to experience God and bask in His presence on greater levels that I have ever experienced before!

What I learned in tonight's reading:

• Our faith needs to be ALIVE! Book knowledge cannot even compare to the knowledge of knowing and experiencing Christ!
• Communion with God can be interwoven in our daily tasks!
• I need to quit pursuing me, and recklessly pursue God in all things! 
• I can sacrifice my wants, and pursue God and do my daily tasks by showing my love to Him! Anything can be used for Him to worship Him! It does not matter how big or small of a task, it is about my sacrifice! It is about the love that I am showing Him, even if it is simply by doing the tasks instead of procrastinating the task.
• I can choose to suffer or choose to worship God in my pain and suffering! It is still sacrifice, and should be about showing Him the love and building up of my faith!
• Prayer does not have just one form. Worshipping God can take many forms. It is simply meeting with God or letting God join in with what we are doing--and choosing to worship Him!

Part 2: Chapter 1: The Beginning of Perfection.

The beginning of perfection starts with Christ. It starts with our faith.

This chapter really just began to stir in me about experiencing God. We can read book after book, but it does not equate to experiencing God. We can learn things about God through book, but realistically given the choice---if we had to choose between hearing facts about someone and experiencing time with them to get to know them first hand... which would you choose? Odds are, you would prefer to spend time with them. It is about awaking our faith and renewing our hope that we can only find in Christ. It is about gaining freedom, and learning to breathing again with the knowledge of God.

 “All that I have heard others say, all that I have found in books, all that I have written myself, seems savorless, dull and heavy, when compared with what faith has unfolded to me of the unspeakable riches of God and of Jesus Christ.”

What we experience in our walk of God cannot compare to what we may read in books. It is through our own experiences that our faith in God comes alive and transforms us in countless ways. I think that is what inspires me most about this particular reading is the faith coming alive… It continues on by stating:

“ Christ alone,” he said, “can reveal Himself to us.” We toil and exercise our mind in reason and in science, forgetting that therein we can see only a copy, while we neglect to gaze on the Incompariable Original. “In the depths of our soul, God reveals Himself, if we but realized it, yet we will not look there for Him. “”we leave Him to spend our time in foolish behavior or speech, and pretend to scorn communing with Him, who is ever-present, who is our King.” “It is not enough, he said, “to know God as theory from what we read in books, or feel some fleeting affection for Him that is brief as the wave of feeling or glimpse of the Divine that prompts them.

“Our faith is ALIVE, and we must make it so, and by its power LIFT OURSELVES beyond all these passing emotions to worship the Father and Jesus Christ in all their Divine perfection.” “This path of faith is the spirit of the Church and will lead to great perfection!”

Not only did Brother Lawrence perceive God as present in his soul by faith, but in all the events of life, whenever they happened, he would instantly arise and seek the presence of God.. using things he saw (like a leafless tree) to lead him up to the Unseen Eternal (the fact of God).

Chapter 2: Pursuing the Sense of the Presence of God

What I enjoyed from this chapter is one thing. Learning how to have constant communion of God. I believe this is what Apostle Paul writes about when he says we should pray without ceasing. We can continue steadfastly, glorifying God, and showing love to Him. We can communion with God daily even as we go about our daily tasks. It will reach the point where our tasks do not hinder our communion with God, our Father. It is a process of practicing to recognize God’s presence even as we go through my daily life. It is not choosing to not just give God a portion of us, but giving God all of us! All of our acts can produce a joy uninterrupted as we commune with God. Our faithfulness can cast away all other thoughts, and leave our souls free for unbroken communion with God. We can worship God and show our love for Him, as we do dishes or pick up a straw that has fallen on the ground, and do it because we LOVE Him!

I love what it says: “In the end, habit became so much second nature that, as he told me, it was in a way impossible for him to turn away from God and busy himself with other matters.” What if our worship through our daily tasks made us fall completely in love with God again? What if we didn’t want to be distracted with non-God things? The presence of God can be reached more readily by the heart and by love than by understand. This is why it won’t matter how many books we read. We just need to fall in love with Him again. We need to experience His presence. He is there, but we may not be experiencing Him like we could be..

Brother Lawrence gives a powerful picture that I am going to type out and share..

“I am giving you a picture of a lay brother serving in a kitchen—let me then use his own words:

“We can do little things for God. I turn the cake that is frying on the pan for the love of Him. When that is done, if there is nothing else to call me I prostrate myself in worship before Him, who has given me grace to work—afterwards, I rise happier than a king. It is enough for me to pick up but a straw from the ground for the love of God. We search for stated ways and methods of learning how to love God, and to come to that love we disquiet our minds by I do not know how many devices. We are giving ourselves a world of trouble, and pursue a multitude of practices to achieve a sense of the presence of God…yet it is so simple. How very much shorter and easier it is to do our common business purely for the love of God, to set His consecrating mark on all we lay hands to, and thereby foster the sense of His abiding presence by [constant] communion of our heart with His! There is no need either of art or science—we can go to Him just as we are, simply and with single heart…I have come to see that my only business is to live as though there were none but He and I in the world.”

Chapter 3: Forsaking All of Self for God

In this passage, we see what it would be like if we truly traded our own selves for the living God. Scripture talks about what happens when we are baptized that our old self is dead, and our life with Christ is what we become—as we are a new creation!

The brother began by what was most perfect, forsaking all for God, and doing everything for His love. He entirely forgot about himself. He did not think about Heaven or Hell or about his past sins once he asked for forgiveness.

“We are made for God and for Him alone. He cannot, therefore, think it wrong that we forsake all, even ourselves, to find our all in Him.”

In forgetting ourselves, we can truly be found. We can only be found, once we see who we are in view of God’s mercy. We can only find our true self as we pursue an intimate relationship with the Lord! In the events of Brother Lawrence (a monk who lived and served in Paris), he chose to stay fixed on God.

During four years of trials, he stayed fixed on the love of God and said: “Let what may come of it, however many be the days remaining to me, I will do all things for the love of God.” What if we surrendered our will to God’s completely? In all the events of life he saw plainly the working of the divine will, and this kept him in perfect peace, because his mind stayed on God. He continued in peace no matter what, because he knew God could remedy anything. When his superiors made a decision he didn’t agree with, he would say: We must believe that they have good reasons for their decisions, and our duty now is to obey and say no more about it!” I want to be a person like that who respects others authority, even when our opinions is at odds with those in authority!

The attitude brought him to so great an indifference about everything, and to such perfect freedom, that it was very like the freedom of the Blessed. What would it be like to live with bias-free, free of prejudice, and without a trace of our old self? What would it look like to be a true citizen of Heaven where nothing on this earth holds us enchained.. for our wills are no longer bounded to this world.

“Everything came alike to him, every station, every duty. The good brother found God everywhere, as near when he was at the humblest task as when praying with the [others in the] community.”

Chapter 4: Do All for the Love of God

The one method of entering God’s presence is to love. Doing it for the love of God should be our method in our walk with God too. I wish, we could seek God’s glory diligently in everything we do. It may be a task that we absolutely dread, but we can sacrifice our own will and do it for Him---out of love for our Creator. We each have things we hate, and how much would our lives change if we began to do things for God’s glory instead of putting things off out of dread…It does not matter how “little” the task appears to be, but it is the value of our offering to God. God doesn’t consider the greatness of the act, but the love that is involved in our sacrifice!

Having a firmness of mind is another quality mentioned when considering the practicing of the presence of God. What if nothing shocked us about the world we live in today, and nothing gave us fear? Sounds mighty wonderful to me… Resting in the truth of God’s promises that God will never deceive us and only send the best for us as His children… Our part is not doubt, but to do and suffer all for the love of Him.

Do we take pleasure in the duties God has given us? I don’t know about you, but I don’t always take great joy in the fact that I have a sink full of dirty dishes to be washed. This may or may not be seen as a “duty”, but it still has to be done---right? This monk, Brother Lawrence, did dishes (way more than I do..) and it was a duty given by God. What if our attitudes hindered the task God gives us? I think, our attitudes DO in fact hinder our walk with God and the tasks He gives us daily!

The book talks about this idea of “What if we fixed our eyes on God, versus reflecting on what to do?” So often the planning (or maybe the procrastination) sucks the life that our tasks could do. They could be countless opportunities to show our love to God, even if it something simple like picking up a straw off the ground (Chapter 2). Our devotion to God could be radically challenged and grown as we do tasks out of LOVE for God!

Chapter 5: Brother Lawrence’s Final Days

The chapter entitled “Brother Lawrence’s Final Days” is what I find amazing. It amazes me and gives me great hope what God can do in a person’s spirit amidst great struggle and pain. Brother Lawrence approached the end of his life without anxiety or concern, which is something I know we each could only hope for. It is possible as we approach the spiritual discipline of recognizing God’s presence is constant and worshiping Him for who He is! I am going to share snippets of the chapter, because my words will fail to capture these last moments and the amount of faith that has me in awe..

“His patience has been great indeed through all his life, but it grew stronger than ever as he approached the end. He was never in the least fretful, even when he was the most wracked with pain. Joy was pain not only on his face, but still more in his speech—so much so, in fact, that those who visited him were compelled to ask if he was not in suffering. “forgive me” he replied. “yes, I do suffer. The pains in my side greatly trouble me, but my spirit is happy and well content.” They added, “Suppose God wills that you suffer for ten years, what then?” “I will suffer,” he answered, “not for ten years only, but until the Day of Judgment, if it be God’s will. And I would hope that He would continue to aid me with His grace to bear it joyfully.” His one desire was that he might suffer something for the love of God.. He embraced it heartily! Often in the hour of pain he would cry out with fervor, “My God I worship thee in my infirmities. Now, now, I shall have something to bear for thee—good, be it so, may I suffer and die with thee.” Then he would repeat those verses of the fifty-first Psalm, “create in me a clean heart, O God. Cast me not away from your presence. Restore to me the joy of my salvation!”…So amazing was his boldness in that dark valley from which so many shrink... We can do nothing better than abandon ourselves to God. He ended with: I am doing what I shall do all eternity—blessing God, praising God, adoring God, giving Him the love of my whole heart!”

I am amazing at the faith of this monk. His timeless example of how faith can overtake our sufferings, and He continues to give God glory. I can only ask: Can I be more like that? Can I be more willful of suffering knowing it is for the love of God and it is a sacrifice that He adores?!

Chapter 6: Part of the Great Band Who Have Forsaken the World for Christ

“Nothing can give a clearer picture of a true Christian philosophy in practice than the life and death of Brother Lawrence. He took the Gospel as his only rule, and forsaken the world to dedicate himself to the life of the spirit and to come to a knowledge of God and of His Son, Jesus Christ.”

Reading a picture of how the Christian life can be is excited to me. It opens up the avenues that we can travel, and ways we can bask in His presence! We can forsake the patterns of this world, and chose to continue to be transformed by God as we fix ourselves on Him—enjoying His awesome presence!

In St. Clement of Alexandra, they said “the great business of a philosopher, that is, a wise Christian, is prayer. Such people pray in every place, at every time, not indeed using many words or thinking to be heard for their much speaking, but in secret in the depths of their soul---while walking, conversing with others, reading, eating, or working. Their praises ring to God unceasingly—not only at specific times during the day, but in all their actions they glorify God..”

It is encouraging to read about how we can experience God no matter where we are or what we may be physically doing. We can worship the Father and our Lord Jesus Christ wherever we are. We can approach God when we are the most busy, wherever we are and whatever we are doing and during our time of leisure! We can see others examples, and be moved to render thanks to God for all His mercies and for the good that He inspires others to do, humbling ourselves before Him for our many failures. We each have an obligation to worship God and love Him.

I will end tonight’s blog with a bit of an excerpt from chapter 6 on the communion with the Father which is sure to be convincing as well as convicting..

“We each have an obligation to worship God and love Him. We cannot carry out this solemn duty as we should unless our heart is knit in love to God. Our communion with Him is so close as to compel us to run to Him at every moment, just like little children who cannot stand upright without their mother’s arms of love.

Far from this communion with our Father being difficult, it is very easy and very necessary for every one—it is to this that the apostle Paul says all Christians are obliged. (1 Cor. 1:9; 2 Cor 13:14, Eph 6:18, Phil 4:6, Col 4:2, 1 Thess 5:17, 1 Tim 2:8)

Whoever does not practice it, whoever does not feel their great necessity, whoever does not grasp their total inability to do it correctly alone, is ignorant of their own self, ignorant of God their Father, utterly ignorant of their continual need of Jesus Christ.

No affairs or cares of the world can serve as an excuse for neglecting this, our duty. God is everywhere, in all places. There is no place in space or time where we cannot draw near to Him and hear Him speaking in our heart. With a little love, just a very little, we will not find it hard.”

12.30.11-The Practice of the Presence of God

I received a book that I had ordered in the mail today. It is exactly what I needed to hear at the moment I needed to hear it. I need to worship God with my infirmities. I need to worship God even in my moments of pain or shear exhaustion. Here is just a bit of the reading..

The Practice of the Presence of God: Collected Thoughts by Brother Lawrence

"The Creator is the great teacher of truth...

Nothing can give us so great relief in the trials and sorrows of life as a loving relationship with God. When such is faithfully practiced, the evils that can assail the body will prove light to us.

God often ordains that we should suffer in the body to purify the soul and to constrain us to abide with Him. How can anyone whose life is hid with God, and whose only desire is God, be capable of feeling pain?

LET US THEN WORSHIP HIM IN OUR INFIRMITIES, OFFERING TO HIM OUR SORROWS WHEN THEY PRESS UPON US, AND ASKING HIM LOVINGLY AS CHILDREN THEIR DEAR FATHER TO GIVE US STRENGTH AND MOLD OUR WILL TO HIS."

Have you worshiped God in your painful moments? Because I know, I sure don't the majority of the time.

The book goes on to give brief prayers that are "very proper" for all sick persons, and prove a wonderful charm against sorrow. I can't speak for the entire human race, but I think my perception would be dramatically challenged if I would choose to practice and see God's presence no matter what the situation of the moment may be. Each thing should be drawing us closer to God, moment by moment, day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. He goes on to say that we should "Consecrate all yours to His love..Believe me, count as lost each day you have not used in loving God."

Practicing to choose to acknowledge God's constant presence is something I think we should all choose to do, especially when God gives us rough moments to teach us that He is constantly there.

Each moment should be bringing us closer to Him.

God knows what we go through daily, so why do we so often choose to not acknowledge Him and deny the opportunity to talk to Him about what we face?

He's our Creator! He knows us better than we know ourselves..

For me, whether sick or well, part of realizing God's presence is choosing to silence ourselves and silence the noises around us. The world around us is constantly blaring some kind of noise that silence often seems like it is not wise.. Only we know from Job that silence has a place in our lives (Job 13:5)

God is constantly present in our lives, but we fail to take notice alot of times. Why? I firmly believe that if we would slow down and quiet ourselves (and our lives), we would be in a better place to recognize God's presence and bask in His presence.

Some verses on God's presence:

Psalm 139:

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?

Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens,

you are there;

if I make my bed in the depths,

you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast.

Jeremiah 23:24

Can anyone hide in secret places

so that I cannot see him?" declares the LORD.

"Do not I fill heaven and earth?" declares the LORD

The Good Shepherd

What I find amazing this Christmas is not the gifts, food, or anything else. What I constantly find amazing that brings me to my knees is my Creator, Savior, and continues to be my shepherd.

I find myself in awe of Him the One I call my shepherd, Savior, and Friend! He is the name above all names! Only He can carry the burdens of my heavy soul no matter what it is we face---He is there ready to hold us and help us through it all. Today, I have just been reflecting and coming to a deeper realization of who God is as my shephard and soul keeper.. It is about recognizing who God is as my shepherd. The one who tends to my soul, and enables me to continue on despite what may happen or how I may feel..

God is soooo good to me, and nothing compares to Him. And, I want to learn more about Jesus as my shepherd!

So often this world is just spinning way out of control and is monitored by its extreme busyness, I am all too aware of the need to just quiet down and slow down. I think this is what the Lord is continuing to show me how to do. I have been forced to slow down quite a bit, but the rest I do willingly. I willingly slow down, and ignore everything else today. The cleaning can wait. The baking can wait (although we will not be doing much baking). The dishes can wait.

It is time that I took more time to bask in my Savior's presence. It is time to realize what I have, when I have Jesus as my good shepherd. It is time to start new habits, and change the way life is lived. It is easy to get caught up in the busyness of this world. I have done it, so I know how easy it is to do. But, is it worth the busyness? Is the task worth doing if we must do it in a hurry? Around this time of year, accumulating more stuff seems more important than enjoying the ones we love. Cooking seems to take place over sitting and basking in His presence. These are why I am glad our family traditions are mellow. I can begin new traditions that focus on basking in His presence versus continually doing.

As the new year approaches, numerous changes are in store I am sure. One of them is learning how to recognize that I am in the Lord's presence constantly, and make a lifestyle out of basking in His presence wherever I am.

Here are a few of the verses that I have been reflecting on as Jesus, my good shephard:

Psalms 23:
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,I will fear no evil,
for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Isaiah 40:11 He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.

Ezekiel 34:2 "Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel; prophesy and say to them: 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Woe to the shepherds of Israel who only take care of themselves! Should not shepherds take care of the flock?

Ezekiel 34:11 "'For this is what the Sovereign LORD says: I myself will search for my sheep and look after them.

Ezekiel 34:23 I will place over them one shepherd, my servant David, and he will tend them; he will tend them and be their shepherd.

John 10:7-18:
So Jesus said again, “I assure you, I am the gate for the sheep. All those who came before me were thieves and robbers. The sheep did not listen to them. I am the gate. Whoever enters through me will be saved. They will be able to come in and go out. They will find everything they need. A thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. But I came to give life—life that is full and good.
“I am the good shepherd, and the good shepherd gives his life for the sheep. The worker who is paid to keep the sheep is different from the shepherd. The paid worker does not own the sheep. So when he sees a wolf coming, he runs away and leaves the sheep alone. Then the wolf attacks the sheep and scatters them. The man runs away because he is only a paid worker. He does not really care for the sheep.

“I am the shepherd who cares for the sheep. I know my sheep just as the Father knows me. And my sheep know me just as I know the Father. I give my life for these sheep. I have other sheep too. They are not in this flock here. I must lead them also. They will listen to my voice. In the future there will be one flock and one shepherd. The Father loves me because I give my life. I give my life so that I can get it back again. No one takes my life away from me. I give my own life freely. I have the right to give my life, and I have the right to get it back again. This is what the Father told me.”

What about the Orphans?

Today, I have been kinda just contemplated "fatherlessness" in this country. Many are without a dad, but what about the others.

Let me just say it..

It's ridiculous that we have families that are have large numbers of their own kids. I am obviously thinking about the Duggars family that just buried their 20th child. It is a tragedy that their child passed. But at the same time, 19 kids....Really?!?
I cannot help but think that we are MISSING IT! Most American families do not have 19 kids. Probably couple only have a couple of kids.. Still, I can't help but ask..

What about the COMMAND to take care of the fatherless and orphans?!?!?!?!?!?

There are NUMEROUS scriptures that point directly to the orphans, and it seems sooo often that we forget about the orphans. Some of us may go do our mission trips, come home, and that's it.. What about the ORPHANS?? What about our fatherless neighbors? Part of this is just me expressing my frustrations (obviously), but really.. Are we so egocentrical that it is more important to bring one or more children in this world, and forget about those kids in needs of warm beds. There are MILLIONS of kids broken, hungry, and hurting because they don't have a place to call "home" and they don't have someone to just LOVE them and call them family and genuinely, unconditionally care for them no matter.

Tonight, I am in a state of frustrations and contemplating a lot of things...Orphans just happen to be one of the issues I am contemplating..

Only in God can we find care in the Lord. We were like sheep without a shephard. seems kinda close to being an orphan. We were lost and undone, and in need of God--our savior! We were screwed up and messed up...broken and left hurting where no resources. THATS when God showed up. We were orphans, but GOD took us in!!

With that said, God may not be calling all of us to adopt. Maybe, we don't have the health to take in a child full-time. Or, Maybe we just do not feel like that's something God is calling us to do. The majority of us have free time I am sure. We can find kids in need of love everywhere. The rate of fatherless children today in America is enormous.

Here are SOME of the statistics about fatherlessness..
· 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. (Source: U.S. D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census).
· 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes.
· 85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.
(Source: Center for Disease Control).
· 80% of rapist motivated by displaced anger come from fatherless homes. (Source:
Criminal Justice and Behavior, Vol. 14, pp. 403-26).
· 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. (Source: National Principals Assoc. Report on the State of High Schools).
· 85% of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in a fatherless home. (Source: Fulton County Georgia jail populations, Texas Dept. Of Corrections, 1992).

These statistics translate to mean that children from fatherless homes are:
· 5 times more likely to commit suicide
· 32 times more likely to run away
· 20 times more likely to have behavioral disorders
· 14 times more likely to commit rape
· 9 times more likely to drop out of high school
· 20 times more likely to end up in prison
Lastly..
• 73% of adolescent murderers come from mother only homes
Daughters who live in mother only homes are 92% more likely to divorce

Do you have time?
Pray about investing in ways to make a difference.
The difference is greatly needed. Pray about what God is calling YOU to do. How can you step out on faith? How can you start working toward being obedient to the command to visit the orphans and take care of the fatherless?

Here are some verses on orphans:

In you the orphan finds mercy.
Hosea 14:3

Never take advantage of any widow or orphan. If you do and they cry out to me, you can be sure that I will hear their cry.
Exodus 22:22-23

For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, "Abba, Father."
Romans 8:14-16

But when the fullness of the time had come, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, that we might receive the adoption as sons.
Galatians 4:4-6

You are the helper of the fatherless. LORD, You have heard the desire of the humble; You will prepare their heart; You will cause Your ear to hear, To do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed, That the man of the earth may oppress no more.
Psalms 10:14,17-18

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.
James 1:27

Father to the fatherless, defender of widows — this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families.
Psalms 68:5-6

When you are harvesting your crops and forget to bring in a bundle of grain from your field, don’t go back to get it. Leave it for the foreigners, orphans, and widows. Then the LORD your God will bless you in all you do.
Deuteronomy 24:19

Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows.
Isaiah 1:17

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.
Proverbs 31:8-9

And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me.
Matthew 18:5

I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!
Matthew 25:40

Statistics pulled from Fathers Unite:
http://www.fathersunite.org/statistics_on_fatherlessnes.html

Logged Out

I have officially logged out of facebook, which never happens. I just need a break. A time to just disengage and be present in whatever is going on in my life. This week is going to be crazy between reading a book for class, turn in reflection, writing a pretty big final paper, attending class, and getting everything ready for Saturday's early morning drive to Fresno for my graduation. Seems like a good time to retune myself into blogging, which is a spiritual discipline that I have been lacking lately.

Instead of gaming on facebook, I can play a game with my nephew. Instead of socializing with my friends (whom I dearly love), I can *hopefully* spend more time in prayer and diligently seeking God. Facebook is great, but when it isn't done with self-control---it isn't all that great.

Signing off facebook for a while may just be my way of coping with life, and it's crazy way of feeling the full roller coaster effect.

Disengaging and finding some sort of solitude is what I seek. It may be found through music, quiet walks with the Father, or through taking silent moments to blog and write what is happening in the now..but it is solitude I seek..
To quote Thomas Merton, who was a monk who knew a thing or two about contemplative living and the pursuit of solitude..
Merton said:
"Solitude is not something you must hope for in the future. Rather, it is a deepening of the present, and unless you look for it in the present you will never find it.”

Unless we look for it, we will never find it! What if we are too "busy" with facebook or something else, and we miss solitude...and the inner peace it gives us.

Utter Awe

I am utter awe of who God is tonight! He is the lover of my soul, and He keeps stirring and drawing me near. Tonight, I got the chance to dig into the Word a little bit. It was a little bit of poking at scriptures, as I sent a verse to a friend. Then, it went from "It kinda sounds like God is talking about Christ..but He can't be...I mean, this is Deuteronomy!"

So off I went into the sunset onto biblos.com to do a bit of researching to see what other translations of the Bible said about the particular scripture, then what different commentaries that discuss what Bible scholars have discovered about bible verses. I use a variety of them, because some people are really off. So I went and see what verses have kinda crossed paths with this verse. Lo and behold what verse do I find:
Matthew 21:11 And the crowds were saying, "This is the prophet Jesus, from Nazareth in Galilee."

So anyway, I figured out "Hey, it is about CHRIST!!!! How cool is that?!?!?!?!?" God lit a fire in my soul tonight. It was much needed. I absolutely LOVE this verse. I do not think I have read it prior to tonight.

Deuteronomy 18:15-19

14 “You will force the other nations out of your land. They listen to people who use magic and try to tell the future. But the LORD your God will not let you do these things. 15 The LORD your God will send to you a prophet. This prophet will come from among your own people, and he will be like me. You must listen to him. 16 God will send you this prophet because that is what you asked him to do. When you were gathered together at Mount Horeb, you became frightened and said, ‘Don’t let us hear the voice of the LORD our God again! Don’t let us see that great fire or we will die!’
17 “The LORD said to me, ‘What they ask for is good. 18 I will send them a prophet like you. This prophet will be one of their own people. I will tell him what he must say, and he will tell the people everything I command. 19 This prophet will speak for me, and I will punish anyone who refuses to listen to my commands.’

A couple things stuck out as I reread this passage a couple time:

a. It kinda related to something I had read about Christian ministry leaders are not to be relevant. According to this scripture, the Lord gets pretty relevant. "I am going to send to you a prophet. It will come from your own people, and he will be like me (Moses). Moses has been the person who has been repeating to the people what God is seeking to tell them despite hardening of their hearts. And God is sending a prophet to be His voice to the people.

b. God seems like he is taking a gradual approach.. using prophets to prepare the people for Christ's coming.

Some questions to ponder:
What if prophets did not precede Christ's coming?
What if in that instant... Christ came instead of having the prophets to prepare the people?

The people were getting their way (You is mentioned 7 times in 2 verses in Deuteronomy 18:15-16). They were getting their desires to not have to hear God's voice and seeing his great fire..Which I imagine would be very scary.

c. God began to prepare the people for Jesus' coming 1,400 ahead of time, which means there must of been alot of preparing...but also, it REALLY excites me that God has planned and states that he is sending someone from the community to speak His truth! God's words would be spoken! He is getting the message out to the people and bringing Salvation to All mankind..

John 17:8
While Jesus is praying:
"for I have passed on to them the message you gave me. They accepted it and know that I came from you, and they believe you sent me."

Temptations

I really appreciated today's verse. I definitely needed this particular reminder.
There is NO temptation that can overcome me.
I have a choice to make....
I choose to rely on God's strength.
Or, I can try to rely on my own strength and fail.

The scriptures says:

1 Corinthians 10:13
Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)
The only temptations that you have are the same temptations that all people have. But you can trust God. He will not let you be tempted more than you can bear. But when you are tempted, God will also give you a way to escape that temptation. Then you will be able to endure it.

There is a key point to this verse... We have to TRUST God. We have to RELY upon God. If we do not rely on Him, we will not know the way of escape..We need strength to endure it! Our strength is not enough. We need God's strength!

The definition of temptation is the act of tempting. Tempting has a couple of different definitions such as:
A. to entice or allure to do something often regarded as unwise, wrong, or immoral.
B. to attract, appeal strongly to, or invite: The offer tempts me.
C. Provoke

Temptations take many forms. If it was spending money, one might not go to the mall. If it is junk food, one might not store junk food at home. If the temptation is watching tv, someone may get rid of cable or unplug their tv. Temptations may take many shapes and forms..

I have been praying that if I am doing something to make myself stumble that God would show me. This is exactly what He did today. I know, I have fallen prey and found myself in tough spots that I thought were something I could handle on my own. There are temptations that I did not even recognize as a temptation. It was just something that was bugging me in a sense, I suppose.

More than ever, I am realizing just how much I need to be on my guard. I have been caught unguarded, and am experiencing temptations, because I was not well guarded. Luckily now that God has revealed this area to me, I know that I can just keep praying over it and giving it to Him. I need to continue in His Word, and let it continue to build me up and draw me closer to Him!

God is definitely still in the business of restoring broken people, which excites me. Even though I have areas where I have given into temptations time and time again, God is still FULL of Grace and Everlasting Love and Truth.. There is nothing too big for God to handle..

The key is keep on Trusting Him, and praying about this area of my life with God.

In closing today's thoughts, I would like to include the points from the devotional. In today's devotion, Joyce Meyer gave five things that make a difference in dealing with our temptations:

1. Be wise about your decisions. Think about your actions and what kind of reactions they will make.

2.Believe you can resist the temptation

3. think of facing temptation as normal life. If you're expecting a fight, you'll always be ready.

4. avoid areas of weaknesses

5.Recognize that you are going to struggle with a temptation. Do not give yourself too much credit, and assume it will not be a trouble area because you have stumbled before. That will make you an easy target.

Dreams and This Week's Challenge

I started doing a devotional by a well known speaker the other day, and I thought I’d write a little bit about that today. In their devotional, it was centered on one thing: “God gives all of us dreams.” God does give all of us dreams. He plants
desires in our hearts.

Using the Word of God, we need to be wrestling with God to find out what He is calling us to do. He is calling each of us to do something, because we have a greater purpose. Each circumstance has a greater purpose. It is not about where we are in the moment, but it is about looking forward to where we can be. There is a balance between contentment and ambition that we need to be striking here. We need to learn to enjoy the seasons we are placed in. Right now, life may be very difficult... This may not be a life-long season. We are constantly meeting new challenges and we have to keep our goal in front of us at all times. God has called us to something. What that something is----this is what we should be discovering. One thing I really want to learn is this.. I want to learn to live the dream despite the circumstances.

The concept itself is talking about God giving us dreams, but I think there is way more to the verse than simply God giving us dreams. It makes it look all happy and comfortable. But, what I got from the verse was something totally different.

Here is the verse in two different translation:

Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he. (KJV)

Where there is no word from God, people are uncontrolled, but those who obey what they have been taught are happy (NCV). –Proverb 29:18

Notice the difference.
Big difference, isn’t it?

Instead of “the vision”, we see what the verse actually means. This is why I thoroughly enjoy using the Bible resources within my reach.. I love to use www.biblegateway.com and www.youversion.com which both use a number of different translations to help me grasp the verse.

Without God’s guidance or the Word of God as our guide, we become uncontrolled people with messy lives. The verse itself takes about how we need God’s Word and guidance in our lives. We cannot lead ourselves. Without God’s guidance, law and order disappear. In one translation, it states that the people run wild without His guidance. We see it all around us. When people do not follow God, chaos erupts!

I am going to connect the dots as I wrestle with “dreams” and “God’s guidance” as my study continues. When we read God’s Word does He give us guidance for our lives? Yes! Does His guidance turn into revealing what He is calling us to do? Absolutely.

Without God’s vision for our lives, we will “run wild” as one translation states. I do not know about you, but living a chaotic life does not exactly thrill me. I like a calm life with as little drama or stress as possible. According to Proverbs 29:18, I can only have this by following the guidance of God. God’s guidance can only be heard when I combine two things: Time in the Word (Bible) and spend time in prayer---talking with and listening to my Abba Father.

My Challenge..

I want to seek His guidance for my life more and more. My time in the Word and Prayer are not always what they seem. I stumble and fall. I neglect my time with my Lord Jesus, just like everyone else. I have a resolution or challenge for myself this week: I want to spend 15 minutes daily in the Word and praying about what I am reading. This does not sound like a lot to most of you. Maybe, some are thinking “that’s it!”.

I am in this for the long haul, and it is about forming habits that have an eternal value. I am hoping to blog daily about what I am reading, contemplating, and wrestling with in my quiet time, but it will just depend on a variety of things. I am hoping to write something about what I am learning even if it is a quick paragraph about each day.. And if I fail to do it, I will admit it. It is about having accountability.

I invite anyone who is willing to join me in my challenge, as I grow in God's Word and develop a more consistent prayer life. I firmly believe that committing to God's Word for 15 minutes a day and spending time to pray and wrestle with what we are being taught will grow us leaps and bounds.

Sleep, Time, and the Good Shepherd

I haven't blogged that much lately. Mostly, because I have not slept much lately. I miss my sleep. Sleep is a precious thing that I miss dearly, but I keep being remembered of Ecc. 3 where time is so valuable and used for different things. There are times and seasons for things in our lives. Evidently, there is a time to sleep and a time not to sleep... Not that the writer meant that there is a time to sleep. Sleep is a necessary part of being human. Not getting sleep is sheer torture.

I have had that sleep is the body's way of healing itself. In some ways, I am sure the body does heal itself. I am a critic in many ways lately. Honestly, I think it is the lack of sleep... But I have always been a bit of a critic.

While I battle sleeplessness, muscle aches, and the pains that come from living with Fibromyalgia and not getting adequate sleep, God's presence is very real to me. Even now, God's presence is here and He is sustaining me. He is the One who holds me together, even when it should feel like I am falling apart.

In my Thursday class, we have been reading and rereading John 10 each week. Tonight, all I could think about is how Jesus Christ continues to be the good shepherd even amidst chaos and a busy life storm. Jesus may not remove the storm.

In John 17:15, Jesus' prayer is not that we are taken out of the world but that we would be sanctified through God's Word which is our truth. Jesus, my good shepherd, is many things to me especially when I am extremely fatigued and can't sleep. Tonight as I reflected on John 10, I wrote this:

He does not run away. At times of great struggles, everyone seems to be running away from it all. They want to get as far away from the situation as possible. While they are running from it, Jesus is already there walking ahead and with His children as we walk through fire. Jesus knows our struggle before it happened! Jesus did not leave or forsake us! Jesus is the One who brings peace amidst the storm. It is something to be endured.. Even in hard times, we (I) can still hear His voice even more clearly in the midst of the trial. He deeply cares and treads the deep waters with us.. And, He leads us to pastures..

Jesus may choose not to remove my Fibromyalgia from me, but it's all good as long as I have Him holding me tight. Even now, God is using me to be a light in a dark, hurting world of aches, pains, and frustration. This is a reality we have to endure, especially if we have chronic illnesses. It becomes our daily reality. Even though this kind of sets us apart from others, God is just using this as an opportunity to share Him and my faith with others. I can share what I am enduring and how I can know without a shadow of a doubt that God walks with me through this fire.

Isaiah 43:2 is my verse right now, as I continue to adjust and endure the new struggles that come my way. It is one we may not think of much unless we are in a rough uncomfortable place in our lives..

"When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you." (Isaiah 43:2)

I think one lesson I am learning is... the promises of Christ and the Bible are eternal, but they also are sooo much more valuable when we experience them first hand. Life is hard. Time has a meaning for everything, but everything happens for a reason. We may think God's timing stinks, but it doesn't matter. His timing is perfect. We do not have to agree with what God does in our lives (because our opinion does not matter in comparison to God's). God knows what He is doing. When we take assure in this, our faith will grow leaps and bounds..

Relieving Stress

Stress relieving is supposed to be a part of the process of life wherever it may find you. If you are like me, you like to bake. Baking, as a stress reliever, doesn't necessarily mean eating all the goods yourself. Eating does not even figure into the equation for me. I just cook for the sake of cooking. And generally, that does mean consuming something so the food does not go bad.

Stress relievers have to be a part of my day if I want to have good days that are more enjoyable. On a rare occasion, stress relief is through writing homework assignments where I ramble on about what I feel I am being taught through various things. Maybe, it is writing about how God can use times of trials to gain me intimacy. Maybe, it is through this blog. Or, maybe the stress relief technique is doing something in a servitude like baking. I bake, and my family eats. This is the game I play. I bake, they eat. They are very good at their job, just like I am decent at my job of baking.

Today's stress relief is through baking a delicious German Chocolate Cake as I type this out..Journaling is another stress relief. I need to decompress when the pain is feeling in control (not now, because my pain pill is in full effect). I had another bout of insomnia last night, and missed church as a result. Of course! These things happen, but still I have got to destress. It is Sunday. I volunteer tomorrow. Today is my time of destressing, so I can begin my week on a good note.

The whole purpose is the necessity of having activities that keep you sane and worry-free. It can be music, cooking (not necessarily eating), taking a walk, watching a movie for the thousand time, or or simply writing.

Whatever avenue you choose---involve God in it! God wants to be a part of everything we are doing. It gives Him pleasure. It is not so much about the task, as it is a part of the intimacy of us and God---and realizing how important the intimacy is. It is also a big part of realizing that God is bigger than everything. He is bigger than our plans. He is bigger than our health concerns. He is bigger than our frets about finding a job. He is bigger than all of it!

God gives us a variety of avenues to contemplate and live for Him, where stress does not have to be part of our equation. God is not a god of disorder (which I associate with stress), but He is the God of Peace!

My Future: In His Hands

My body is frequently attacking itself. I have fibromyalgia, so that's just one of the things my body tends to do. It is very manageable except for I just go through moments where I hurt for a couple days then I can go on and do my normal routine again. Normally, it is only a once or twice a month type of routine of hurting for a couple days, not that it is all too predictable. I am lost in this world that I can't understand. Who am I? I have changed over the last few months. Realistically, it has not been a willingness to change, but a mandatory change brought to me by my body. Mostly the changes come from the change of how I feel, resulting in what I am able to do.

I can no longer be defined by what I do as I could easily have done before. Oh, I am the girl that does this and that... That is no longer how I can be defined, because *doing* is not something that is easily done these days. Doing things requires energy. Depending on the day will determine how well a task is accomplished. While I know there is a life worth living out there, I struggle with this idea of who am I.

I am a child of the Most High God! This has not changed.

Therefore, I know He has a task before me. While writing for a class, I found this concept crossing my mind. God put seminary on my heart before I got diagnosed with fibromyalgia. God knew I was going to have this "thorn in my side". I am the girl who always has a plan, and this is uncharted territory for my anyway. What is next for me? I graduate in December, and I do not have a plan. My life has been a mess for the past couple months, but it is still moving forward even if I do not know what is next. Seminary is still weighing on my heart very heavily, but I do not hold the future. I do not know what is next, or what God is choosing to do next in my life.

I sit here, waiting, praying, and asking for God to guide me in the next step of my life in whatever direction God is planning on taking me. This verse kinda hit me while I was praying earlier which states it all.... Jeremiah 33:2-3 says: “This is what the Lord says—the Lord who made the earth, who formed and established it, whose name is the Lord: 3 Ask me and I will tell you remarkable secrets you do not know about things to come."

I lack knowledge about many things.
This world and its craziness
Knowing how to live life right now
Oh yeah, and this little detail called the "future".

But, I know what Jeremiah 29:11 says:
God knows the plans He has for me...
Plans for my welfare, hope, and a future..
He is not out to get me.
He is not trying to derail me.
But, God has the best in store for me and my life. It does not have to look picture perfect. God has a will for my life. He knows exactly what He is doing, and His will will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. I just do not know what those plans are.

Hold Each Other Up

In Exodus 17:12, it says: "Eventually, Moses' hands felt heavy. So Aaron and Hur took a rock, put it under him, and he sat on it. Aaron held up one hand, and Hur held up the other. His hands remained steady until sunset."

So many of us are tired. It may be emotionally, physically, or spiritually, but I love this picture of us holding each other up physically and spiritually. We should be there for each other, because it is the picture of the global Church coming together as One--caring for one another which may mean holding one's arms up when they weak.

I see this scripture come to life in my own life, as I battle different things. As I battle the illness I face, I see the support of others and how it supports me as I win the battle against fibermyalgia.


Even when we get tired and could (and WANT to) give up, we need to have our friends right by our side to help us perservere and continue on. It may be through facebook or sitting with someone as they face trials. I am so thankful for my friends who support me and keep me going. One of my facebook group has been a God-send. It has kept me going when I may have given up. The people, there, inspire me. We are a family. It doesn't matter how far away we really are from each other in distance either. We help each other and "hold each other" up just like they did in the bible verse they mentioned. I have to share what happened from Moses' friends helping him hold his hands up (it was reaching up to praise God is what it symbolized..). There was a war going on, and their team won as a result of Moses AND his friends.... We too are HOLDING each other up and winning the war against Fibromyalgia and whatever else comes our way...

As I reflect on the passage, I want to ask:

How can I help support and hold another up? It may be through emotional or prayer support.. How can I be there for someone else to help them win the war they are facing, because we are all facing something?

Our lives before trials come

We each have pictures of our lives before trials come. There is the person we used to be. Maybe, we were incredibly wealthy until tragedy strikes. Or if you are like me, trials come to enable you to be grateful for what you have and slow down to enjoy it.

As trials come, our lives change. These trials are ways that God can continue to mold us and make us more like Him---if we choose to love and live for Jesus Christ. Tragedy and trials change our character no matter who we are or what we are about. Our lives change, as we encounter different experiences.. Trials are messy and can destroy what we once were, but God is building us up to be greater than who we used to be.

I found this in my morning devotional.. Well-worth sharing..

There was a man...whose name was Job; and that man was blameless, upright, fearing God and turning away from evil. 2 Seven sons and three daughters were born to him. 3 His possessions also were 7,000 sheep, 3,000 camels, 500 yoke of oxen, 500 female donkeys..Job 1:1-3

This, of course, was the life as Job used to know it, before his character was tested. His life became an unwelcome ride on a trolley called tragedy. And through all of this, Job refused to blame God or to sin.

This Battle

It has been a week since my diagnosed of Fibromyalgia, and it has not been an easy week per-say. I have had an ongoing struggle. People ask me how I am, and I battle the usual "okay" versus saying how I truly feel. But when people are asking as they walk away, how can you say "No, I am not okay." Or how do you say, "you know what, I am not doing so good today."

I do not think it has hit me yet. I think I am still waiting to wake up, and have it disappear. Since that does not look like it is going to happen anytime soon, I am doing what I can. I am researching. I am noticing how the symptoms of this illness progress. I am medicating myself through a nightly prescribed medicine and daily vitamins. I have regained some of my spiritual strength, and I am putting on my armor to fight this battle.

Fibromyalgia is like other battles we all face. Whether they are friendships in turmoil, temptations of our old self, and other trials and temptations. The trials keep us down for moments at a time, but we can choose how to fight. When we weak, it is easy to be overcome by life's adversities. This is what the adversary one wants. The devil wants to kick us while we are down. And at times, I am sure he does kick us while we are done. I know I have felt some of those very hard punches in the face lately.

In James 1:2, scripture reminds us that trials should be considered pure joy. Some days, I wonder how they can be considered joy. Some days, I think they are pure joy. It may mean that we must be doing really well spiritually if the devil finds us worth picking on. And on those other days, I do not have the strength to fight or think about the fight. On these particular days, I get punched extra good. These days mean I have not thought or prayed about a plan of attack. How will I handle this today?I need to have plans of attacks, if I plan on winning the battle. I need new methods of fighting.

On Sunday, I was reminded of the One who fights on my behalf. Jesus is winning the victory for me. I cannot give up, even on the days I want to. When I made weak, He is my strength. I become completely dependent on Him, and that is when His strength is more than enough.

In the Common English Bible, Philippians 4:13 is worded this way: " I can endure all these things through the power of the one who gives me strength." We can endure ALL these things through the Power of God. That kinda makes it hard to give up when we have that verse in mind, doesn't it?

As my weak arms and hands compose this blog, I know how easy it is to say "Well I hurt, and can't do this!" Do you have another option? We can either try to fight in our own strength and lose the battle, or we can trust in Him completely and let Him become our strength.. The choice to fight is more than a daily struggle. But it is also all we have. We are the only ones that can say "let's do this." Sometimes the ones fighting this battle is only us and Jesus, and no-one else. But, we can do this!

2 Corinthians 12:10 says, "Therefore, I’m all right with weaknesses, insults, disasters, harassments, and stressful situations for the sake of Christ, because when I’m weak, then I’m strong."

While I am not "all right" with my weakness, I choose to let God fight my battle for me. Prayer is the cornerstone for any battle. We would not go into a war-zone without armor. We need prayer to face this hidden battle. It is not so well hidden. We experience some kind of battle daily. Maybe, physical. Maybe, emotional. Maybe, spiritual. But we encounter battles daily, and we should greet them with prayer.

Here are some of the bible verses I have been wrestling with as I undergo this invisible, but very real battle....

Exodus 14:14
"The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

Deuteronomy 1:30-31
"The LORD your God is going before you. He will fight for you just as he fought for you in Egypt while you watched, and as you saw him do in the desert. Throughout your entire journey, until you reached this very place, the LORD your God has carried you just as a parent carries a child."

Ephesians 6:10-13;18
"Finally, be strengthened by the Lord and his powerful strength. Put on God’s armor so that you can make a stand against the tricks of the devil. We aren’t fighting against human enemies but against rulers, authorities, forces of cosmic darkness, and spiritual powers of evil in the heavens."

Therefore pick up the full armor of God so that you can stand your ground on the evil day and after you have done everything possible to still stand.

Offer prayers and petitions in the Spirit all the time. Stay alert by hanging in there and praying for all believers."

Lesson in Dignity

Esther 1:1-12

"Queen Vashti refused." Oh, a moment in history that can never forget. She stood up to her husband, who was the King as well. I am not sure if it was actually a good or bad thing that she refused. But if my husband was drunk and wanted to show me off to his drunk party guests, I would refuse too. The woman may have very beautiful, but she also had some dignity to refuse to go where men from all 127 Providences were sitting, and getting drunker by the moment. The king had been sharing his glory with those he wanted to impress, but he had one more trick up his sleeve. He had his beautiful wife, and had to show her off. She was summoned by the king to make her appearance as the 6 month party and 7 day feast were finishing up, and she refused. This woman would have to pay for choosing to not go with her husband, but something excites me about this account. She had dignity. She refused to be someone's prize. She was a woman of worth. She was the Queen of Persia for goodness sakes.

As some of us know how the story goes, she loses her husband and the crown. The law prohibited women from disobeying their husbands. If the Queen did not follow her husband, what would other women do? Would the ordinary women follow in her footsteps?

As I wrestle with this passage of scripture, I cannot held but be excited about this scripture. She is not talked about much, but she is seen as a woman of some character. She had the task of entertaining the women from the Providences, when her husband summoned her. She was to go parade herself among the drunk, nobles of the providences. But, she refused. I have to throw out a "Rock on!" , for the following reason: She was a woman of character. She was not going to go walk into an open bar full of drunken men. Her husband should have protected her, by not summoning her to go and bring the crown. But as a man of insecurity, he did.

As I read the scriptures, and think about what a godly woman would look like, I think we could learn a great deal from Vashti who once was the Queen of Persia. She stood up for herself, when her husband did not. She showed her dignity, and carried it from what we can see in the scriptures. Her dignity is seen in her refusal. She refused to go and parade around drunken men. She refused to ruin her reputation or be a possession. She denied the king's request. We can learn about submission through this passage of scripture, as we see the king's actions of not diligently having the best interest for his wife in store, when he summoned her. She did not submit--she refused to submit. He merely felt insecure and tried his best to impress all of the nobles, princes, and other important people in the Providences. When those attempts failed, he summoned for his beautiful wife to come in and save the day. On the other hand, she was not insecure. She held on to her dignity with her head held high, knowing it would cost..

Dignity is just as important now for us, as it was back in the days of Queen Vashti. She could have chuckled the words, “do you know who I am?” when asked to go and make her grand appearance in front of the providences’ men as they continued to drink and become intoxicated by her appearance. She refused. Her stand for dignity is one that all can learn from, as she sought to be respectable after all she was a queen. Still, we are respectable and royalty. As a child of God, I am a princess. I am the daughter of the King. We are royalty. We should seek to live life in such a way that makes us reject certain demands and continue to live a life of self-worth and pursue our Lord Jesus.

Content in Weakness

I have been reflecting on 2 Corinthians 12 much more these days. I have been reading about Job, different verses on persecution, and various sufferings that other followers of Christ have endured. I have had the privilege to see Christians suffer, and you can see their faithfulness to their God. God is glorified through it all!

As I sat and waited, wondering what would happen at the doctor. I ponder the words found in 2 Corinthians 12:10, which said:

“For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

“What would it mean to be content with this weakness?” Today, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. My mysterious illness now has a name. My symptoms are no longer “just in my head”, but they are in some way validated and made more real through having a diagnosis with an actual name. They are the insults of my body. They are trials I must endure, whether I want to or not.

Being contented with this weakness, for me, means relying on Him. It does not mean not treating the illness with some modern day medicine (or attempting to treat this “weakness”), but it means for me to continue to let Him be my strength. We may face a variety of weaknesses, but who do we choose to determine our path of life? Is the priority the situation or Christ? It is choosing to act in such a way that puts Christ first, and casts aside how else we may want to react to the situations we encounter.

Without Him, I can do absolutely nothing. But with Him, I can do all things! God gives me the strength (Matt. 19:26). He continues to teach me through this muddy process of going from a busy maniac to a person who will one day know the value of rest.

I have walked this road of wondering for a while, and I firmly believe God does not give us more than we can handle. In the sense that God will equip us to do everything He gives us. God may bestow illness upon us, but it is for His glory—and His glory alone! We do not have to understand it, but we have to remember that “he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion” (Philippians 1:6).

Her Hand in Marriage- Introduction Quotes-

I am reading a really good book, and I am going to use this page to share some of those quotes..

The Book: Her Hand in Marriage
The Author: Douglas Wilson

-Introduction-

Now, all that is left is the quotes....

The quote is really long, but it is the one that has given me the most thought..

"..If a man expects a woman to respond to something when he has not yet initiated, he is like someone who expects a tennis partner to return the serve when he has not yet served. This is an "easy way out"--young Christian men often abdicate in this way. They want to find out what the woman's response would be if they initiated--without actually having to take the risk of initiation. Once the man knows that the woman would respond positively, then he initiates. This is the coward's option, leaving the burden of the initiation on her. When the man abdicates in this way, the woman is being conned into taking the initiative. Having to deal with the girl's father prevents all this. This means that a man who is initiating in a relationship must take quite a risk in talking to her father. But God has designed it so that the man is the one who is to take such a risk. He initiates, and, if she has received her father's blessing, she responds. This is biblical courtship."

This quote in particular is very valuable, because this world likes to confuse us about our roles. God's design is perfect. We would forsake a bundle of problems if we chose to view dating as well as marriage from God's perspective, and would not have a problem with submission. Initiating is not how we were made. We were made with the desire to be protected. How we carry out our roles can determine whether or not we are protected in our future relationship.

"If a couple only went out three or four times, there may not be much damage--that will come after they each have seen twenty people three or four times."

"Because the church has largely adopted a worldly system of dating, the walls of protection for our children which God designed have been broken down."

"Apart from BIBLICAL dating or courting, there are many destructive consequences--emotional, sexual, and spiritual. But if a young man seeks to initiate a relationship, and takes full responsibility for the relationship under the woman's father, there is scriptural accountability and protection."

"The modern dating system does not train young people to form a relationship. It trains them to form a series of relationships, and further train them to harden themselves to the break-up of all but the current one. At the very least, this system is as much a preparation for divorce as it is for marriage."

"Men are created to initiate, and women are created to respond. But we are not mechanical robots--God does not want us to initiate foolishly, or respond foolishly. First, the bible calls men and women to fulfill their respective roles in courtship, and secondly, they are called to fulfill them with wisdom. Such wisdom requires that we follow God's revealed design."

-James 1:2-4

James 1:2-4 (The Message)

"Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way."

Even though I want so badly to feel better, I know that my faith is at work. As I sit here and have enjoyed a good day as far as my health goes. God is testing me, and building up my faith. We are called to consider it an absolute gift from God where we are pressed on all sides and under tests. It does not always feel like a blessing though, does it?

I personally do not feel the blessing until after the test is over, then I can smile and say "Finally, God. Thank you! It is finally OVER!!" I enjoy the effects of the suffering, but not the trial. I enjoy the faith that is being built, but I despise the learning time. It can be seen as the equivalent to wanting the degree, but not wanting the years of work it takes to get that college degree.

Trials force us to show our faith for what it really is. Through our trials, we (and everyone else) see our faith for whatever it is. It is an encouraging experience, especially when we think about Philippians 1:6 which says: " he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."

God is continuing to work in me. It is painful. It is ugly. It is uncomfortable. But, it is progress. It is reassurance that God never gives up on me, because I am constantly reminded that I will fail without Him by my side!